Stardate: 24553.2
There are so many things in the world that are corrupt that I can't even begin to understand...some I don't even want to. It's strange how we consider ourselves as free people. But, if you thought really hard about it, you'd realize that we're not. We live under a false sense of security thinking that we're safe when we can succumb to an infinite number of possible things. Whether it be justified or not, we live in a realm of the unknown. There is nothing else in the world that scares the living shit out of me more than that.
Time is a curious thing, we live as of now. What's been done is done and there is no way to change the past. The future is unpredictable but we have access to choose the outcome. Everything is chosen by us as sentient beings and excepted or regretted. I have no choice but to except the inevitable. There are a few things I do regret...
First, I regret getting in trouble. I'm a good person and even though I need to take the punishment for my crimes, I still don't want to face it and I still don't think I deserve it. Second, I regret meeting a boy I absolutely fell in love with, who popped out of nowhere, and not moving my messed up life to Phoenix and starting over like I should have. It's too late for that now. Third, I regret making everything seem like it is okay. I know that for the past few months things haven't been okay, things aren't okay, and I'm not really sure whether or not things will ever be okay. I sure as hell don't have anyone here telling me it going to be okay.
I live as though my ship is being sailed straight into the heart of the enemy. There is a war and it's all hands to battle stations. No hope of escape, no hope of survival, just waiting for the attack. Everyone must do there best, despite the odds, and fight to the bitter end...just as we do in real life. We are not safe, but we all do the best we can, and that's all we really can do.
