Stardate: 25723.3
Letting your imagination run wild can be a very bad thing. You think you know someone...They tell you things and you believe everything they say. However, sometimes their actions contradict their words. When that happens, I start believing that they are working against me in the worst ways. If I'm left in the dark too long, my mind keeps wondering and wondering until I start believing things I put together. Then, I freak out and explode. I make such a mess of things out of what could be nothing...yet still could also be true.
I'm frustrated with the fact that I care so much about this guy, I do very generous things for him and go out of my way to make sure he's happy. He's been through a lot...more than one person alone should go through...I’m always there for him…and I get nothing, just the hard emotions that come with it. I don't ask for anything in return except for his attention and some time to spend with him.
I started to think that he was just using me, calling me only when he needed something and then start avoiding and ignoring me when he didn’t. He does things that make me question how he really feels. I just want him to be safe and happy…that’s all! But, it’s like he doesn’t want that or something…I don’t know.
